VIBES: #02 jumoke

This story is a series, you should read the first part here if you haven’t. Enjoy!

#02 Jumoke

Indifference is a mask. Yes, you probably know that already, but it could get sticky and then you don’t know when to take off the mask and when to keep it on, then life just gets blurry. It was blurry for me. It was like I was living a long dragging meh and school began to suck, until Jumoke. You see, Jumoke changed my life.

They say you could be surrounded by a bunch of people or be in a rowdy crowd and still be lonely. I think the popular quote is incomplete. The only reason you’d still be lonely or feel alone while you’re surrounded by people – friends or not – is because you really want someone else and all those people combined don’t cut it. Sometimes you know this person, sometimes you don’t. Not like you don’t but you’re not aware. Your brain is not aware but your heart knows and somehow your brain hasn’t fully interpreted it yet. Now when our brain does get the message and you know, the person might be the hardest person at that time to get to, probably because they don’t know who the hell you are or they don’t care as much as you do. This is where loneliness could be so crappy, you’d think you’d die from it. It’s like drowning. I wanted my brother. People loved me, but I just wanted him to love me and indifference never let it show that I was dying.

I led a group study for WAEC because I was the senior prefect and it was obligatory, although no other pervious senior prefect had done that, the teachers kept pressuring me to set it up. We met three times a week, discussed what we were taught and solved past questions together. It was work for me, because I had to know everything; everyone already thought I did. This was my escape. I felt most at ease in these group meetings because my mind was so occupied with information and Kiitan was never around, so I didn’t have to worry about awkward eye contact. We were about seven. Six guys and a girl, the head girl, because she had to be involved. We pasted flyers on the notice board but didn’t announce on the assembly because we didn’t want a crowd, we only want people truly interested to join. At first it was just us, I and Mary. She was a good girl, the same way I was a good boy but damn! She was smart and she intimidated me so it was a huge relief when three guys joined the next week and then two more the next, then one final addition the following week.

Jumoke Badmus joined the fifth week and she came late that hot Friday. Tayo, one of the boys was discussing demand and supply in Economics, we sat in a circle. Mary was the first to notice her at the door, she went over to talk to her and then they came in together. From the moment I laid eyes on her I couldn’t take them back. She was tall and chubby, not too chubby, somewhere between chubby and slim. Her butt was big, it stained against the fabric of her uniform. I was staring. Then I looked again to her face, it was so smooth even though I hadn’t touched it I could feel it with my eyes and she had these big eyes (the most mesmerizing I’ve ever seen) with full lips, the type you don’t see too often on a fine girl and when she smiled as Mary introduced her, I lost several breaths. I crossed my legs, then uncrossed them as the introduction continued. Mary was mentioning everyone’s name round the circle, I crossed my leg again. I looked away when it was a person away from me and fell into Deji’s gaze, who was smiling mockingly at me. I raised my brows to say what? when I heard my name. She looked at me and I died for a nanosecond. She smiled and I couldn’t do anything, my brain must have been paralyzed, I was thinking ‘what should I do? What should I should do? I should do something.’ I uncrossed my legs. Mary continued and now Jumoke’s butt was sideways, right in front of me. I was in turmoil – good turmoil – but for the rest of that meeting, I couldn’t answer any questions or say anything. I nodded a few times when others asked me for my opinion mostly because I had forgotten most of all I knew. My head was blank. I was watching the new girl the whole time, I tried not make it too obvious but I couldn’t help it. She was smart, I expected her to be a bimbo, because most girls with butts like hers were, and even though girls like that turned me off, nothing could repel me from her. She had me at first sight. I felt compelled. I don’t remember her looking at me even once that day.

I ran home, literally. I didn’t say good bye to anyone, I wanted to tell Kitan about Jumoke. I was walking from our junction where the korope, a public transport mini bus, had dropped me when I remembered I couldn’t tell him. I was miserable throughout the weekend and I couldn’t stop thinking about her and what I was going to do but even worse than that was the realization that I was alone in my misery.

Monday dawned. The plan was to ignore, hide, and run if need be. I soon found out that was impossible, as much as I wanted to avoid being around her, I also found myself drawn to her and later, stalking her. She was in another class, it was weird that I had never noticed her before the study group. “She’s not outspoken, and her parents were very strict o” Pemi had told me when I asked what Jumoke was like. Pemi was in her class and was my friend too, no, not friend, more like a girl I knew was crushing on me and would do anything for me. Everyone knew about the ‘Pemi Crush saga’; how she kept sending me love letters since primary school and the numerous people she had told who at one point or the other that she liked me and then those ones come tell me. I thought it was creepy before but considering how Jumoke made me feel, I understood a fraction of Pemi’s advances and I even sympathized for her within myself and asked for forgiveness from God because I always avoided her, but not that Monday. I wanted to know about Jumoke and Pemi was my only route. I remember thinking Pemi was fine, not my typaa babe but fine, finer than I thought, or finer than primary school her.

It was after the study group one Wednesday evening, everyone was preparing to go when I saw her approaching me, though I pretended not to. I was now perfect at watching her every move without her noticing. I continued packing my books into my bag but I was pensive with every step she took towards me.

“Hey” I turned. I couldn’t breathe. I was never good with girls, especially girls I liked. “Enitan?” I nodded. “Mary says you’re really good at further maths.” I nodded. “I need help” I nodded. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. “You don’t talk or you assume I understand sign language?” I coughed and maned up or something. Didn’t Pemi say she wasn’t outspoken? Did Pemi even know the girl? I began to think. “I do.” I tried not make my voice sound shaky. “What can I do for you ma’am?” I feigned confidence.
She had said “Teach me please, and answer a few questions too.” Of course, of course. I felt like a complete tard.

She kept correcting my errors for the next hour. I couldn’t think straight around her, and I began to question if she really didn’t get polynomials and was just fronting, and so I did the most foolish thing imaginable. I asked. She gawked. “you think I’d make up a story to be around you?” Her accent was so cool sha, and I noticed her eyes got bigger as she talkedp. “The only reason I even spoke to you was cos Mary spoke highly of you and encouraged me to. I didn’t even know you didn’t know anything and you are one of boys that think every girl wants to be with ehn? Please, No. I don’t fully understand this topic.” I expected her to leave after that but she continued. “please quickly get over yourself  and explain to me.” I fell in love with her there, right there.

Fast forward to a week, we spoke again. We had practical Agric together. It was more of a punishment than practical, we were weeding the school farm. She was with a cutlass, working at some shrubs when I saw her and yelled, shooing her with my hand “hey hey stop, that’s not a weed, it one of the trees we planted” She quickly left it and took a few steps back.
“Really?” She asked
“I have no idea.”
“What?” She looked at me like I was some fool.
“I have no idea whether it’s a tree or weed.”
“What did you do that for?” She started walking away without waiting for a reply. Wiggling her bum. I jogged after her, “hey hey I was trying to be funny.”
“ Uhm um” She replied. I caught up with her.
“What does that even mean?”
“I don’t have to explain myself.”
“You don’t… You’re beautiful” What was I saying?
“Uhm um”
“You get that alot abi?”
“What do you want Enitan?” Yeah, what did I even want?
“I want to be with you.” She stopped and chuckled. “You want be with me?”
“Yeah, So can I stay?”
“It’s not my problem if you want to be a bodyguard?”
“Uhm um” I mimicked. She laughed.
“Why don’t you smile often?” I asked
We found a tree and sat under the shade. “I don’t?”
“You don’t.”
“I always thought you didn’t.”
“Me?”
“So you’ve been watching me?”
“No, not really, but the few times I see you, you’re always serious looking”
“ehn ehn?”
“Yes.”
“I guess few things make me smile.”
“Like what?”
“You” and I proved it with a smile.
“Are you flirting?”
“I don’t know, how does that work anyway?”
“If you want to go on a date, all you have do is ask.”
“But I don’t just want to go on one date.” I confessed
“How many?”
“Many.”
“Didn’t your daddy teach you to start small?”
“No, he gave me the book – Dream big – to read when I was younger, guess that messed me up”
“How old are you now?”
I laughed. “Who asks that?”
“Me. How old are you?”
“Sixteen, tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Yeah”
“You don’t look excited or is it a big boy thing?”
I chuckled. “Do I look like a big boy?”
“Yes.”
“How does a big boy look?”
“I donno, like you.”
“Uhm um.” She was laughing.
“Are you going to celebrate it?”
“What?”
“Your birthday.”
“Oh, I don’t think so.”
“Why not?”
“Are you always this upfront?”
“You are the one who wanted to be with me, Why not?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t thought about it.”
“You are weird.”
“Who isn’t?” She looked away from me to the farm where only a few people were working the others had broken into different cliques under different trees. “Yes, who isn’t?” She mused then face me again. “I’ll take you out tomorrow, for your birthday.” I was surprised and I didn’t have time to hide it. “Why would you do that?”
“Because I like you and you make me laugh and you think I’m beautiful and it’s your birthday tomorrow.”
I dropped my head and shook it “you are different.”
“I’ll take that’s good news. So tomorrow? During break?”
“I can’t leave school during break, it against the rules.”
“And what? You haven’t broken one in your life?”
“I’m the head boy.”
“And it has entered your head.”
“No, it’s just…” I was starting to feel self conscious.
She cut in “It’s just that that’s the only time I can go out with you. After school, my driver will be waiting.”
“Oh.”
“Yes. Do you want to or not?”
“I do.”
“Tomorrow then.”
“Tomorrow ”

*
My sixteenth birthday sucked. Kiitan and I didn’t go to school together anymore and I hardly saw him in the morning but I desperately wanted to at least share our birthday that year so I went to his room at 12am, he was awake and cleared caught off guard. “Happy birthday.” I said with a lopsided grin.  He nodded and said “same to you” My heart dropped but I still had hope you see, the girl of my dream was going to celebrate my birthday with me. All things are possible became my motto and I made a mistake of expending that to my relationship with my brother. I was standing at the door and he was sitting on his bed. “Can I come him?”
“Sure.” His room was so different, it had been a long time I had been there, there were paintings on the wall. I couldn’t remember Kiitan ever painting or with any specific love for art. I assumed he bought them. He didn’t, I learnt that later. He sat on the bed next to me, he was scribbling something on paper. “You know” I started. “There’s this girl, her name is Jumoke, Kiitan you have to see her, she’s exceptional and when she talks…”
“I want to sleep now.” I pretended as if I hadn’t hear him. “Hum?”
“I want to sleep right now Enitan, can we do this some other time?”
“Yeah, of course.” I managed to say, biting my lips and then left for my room, but I didn’t sleep that night, I couldn’t find it.

Mary found out it was my birthday and setup a surprise party by break time with all the prefects. I was beyond torn. I was happy they thought me so important, and was honoured but break time? Really? Who did I offend? Probably a wicked old witch in my mother’s village. I told Mary I couldn’t stay and I had somewhere to be but she would hear a word of it and when I wanted to go and look for Jumoke so I could explain, she blocked the way with a couple of other prefects because they thought I wanted to run away. I couldn’t be happy. I couldn’t be sad. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. Immediately they let me go, I went look for Jumoke. She wasn’t in her class, so I went to the gate, she wasn’t there too. The bell had already gone for the end of break time so I headed back to her class. The teacher was already in but I had to talk to her, so I asked for permission. Since I was friends with most of the teachers, this one included, he let me.

When she came out I held her hand and I begged “I’m so sorry, I’m sorry. It was Mary, she planned this party and I couldn’t escape. I’ll make it up to you, please.. I’m really sorry.”
“Okay” she said wanly.
“Babe, please I wanted to…”
“I said okay, it’s fine. There’s a teacher in my class. I’m not mad. Your brother was better company anyway.” She started to step away. I was dumbfounded, then she turned back and retraced her steps towards me then whispered straight into my ear “and an excellent kisser too.” My heart stop, I don’t know how long. I let out a hasty gush of hot air as she walked away, wiggling her big bum. I felt like a burst balloon.

… Till next Friday loves! ❤

PS: so my friends and I went absolutely crazy and decided to start an online magazine that’s set to launch fully in March. If you’d like to contribute, go here.

Happy love weekend 💞💞💞
Show someone some love.